The Reverse of Being Ü

It amazes me how one person can make you so sad with just a mere bat of an eyelash. The pang in itself is prolonged, the tremors of it leaving you dumbfounded, unsure and unbelieving that you allow yourself to be subjected to it in the first place and that somebody would have the gall to mete out such atrocious behavior to someone who doesn’t deserve such treatment. These can either be meant coldheartedly or worse without knowledge and intent, but either way there’s one thing you can be certain of --- sadness amalgamated with anger leaves you both weak and frustrated. It leaves you tired of the other, of yourself, of the higher being that finds your circumstance as amusing. If only one or the other can dissolve into thin air and never materialize again if its purpose is only to hurt you, but whom are you kidding? You’d rather disappear yourself because you wouldn’t be able to live with it. It’s difficult to lose a person through death. Much more if you deliberately lose them while they are alive.

In every situation there is an option, a choice. Slim pickings. It is selfish, but I have to say it, self-preservation. Everyone else has the potential to cause you harm, to inflict pain, to bring sadness. So for crying out loud--- Don’t be a martyr! Don’t be a hero! Take care of yourself. Because the sad truth is, as virtuous and sympathetic as you are, it doesn’t mean others will be.

Time ticks on. Or has time stopped?